Summary of the book "Leading with Love and Laughter" - By Zina Sutch and Patrick Malone

Key Concepts in this book:

1. Love is required for great leadership.
2. Leaders that are passionate about what they do build winning teams and make a difference in people's lives.
3. Self-awareness, vulnerability, and kindness are all required for leading with love.
4. Laughter fosters a more comfortable, creative, and productive work atmosphere.
5. In the workplace, there are several opportunities to deploy sincere humour throughout the day.
6. Appropriate workplace humour has numerous advantages.

Who can benefit the most from this book:

• Leaders who want to show their team some love.
• Laughter-lovers who want to bring humour to the workplace.
• Managers looking for new ideas to get the most out of their team.

What am I getting out of it? Through love and humour, you can become a better leader.

The term "love" is used all throughout the world. You probably use it in your relationships because you love your partners, siblings, parents, and friends – and they love you as well. But you probably also enjoy pizza, reading, and a variety of other activities that don't reciprocate your affection.

On the other hand, you probably don't talk about love in the job very often. After all, who doesn't like their coworkers, employers, or employees? You might be passionate about your job, but that's the same as being passionate about pizza.

In this summary, you'll learn the true meaning of love and how to become a better leader by infusing your leadership with both it and humour.

• You'll learn the most crucial sort of love to apply as a leader.
• The three fundamental ingredients to exhibit love in leadership.
• And the numerous ways laughter can be good in the workplace in this summary.

1. Love is required for great leadership.

Love is present in some aspects of our lives, but not in others - particularly leadership.

Even though the words love and leadership are rarely seen combined, leadership author Mike Myatt argues in a 2012 Forbes article that excellent leadership rarely exists without love and that where leadership fails, love is frequently lacking, misplaced, or mistaken.

Love is complicated, and it necessitates a sense of security in the face of the unknown. Unfortunately, many leaders prefer the predictability and consistency of established processes and patterns of leadership. It's simple, but it isn't love. Teams are aware of this. In reality, there's a link between workplace emotions and employee well-being and engagement; where there's a lack of love, businesses underperform.

The main point here is that great leadership necessitates love.

Of course, you understand what love is, don't you? After all, it's a rather popular concept. However, if you're going to use love in your leadership, it's worth considering what love is. The ancient Greeks had a philosophical approach to love, categorizing it into seven types: eros – physical, sexual love; storge – the unconditional love you have for your children, parents, and siblings; and philia – friendship love.

However, philautia – self-love – is a sort of love that is extremely important in leadership.

Philautia is most likely the love that means most in your life, not just in terms of leadership. You can't truly love someone else unless you first love yourself. You must be able to forgive, nurture, and treat yourself with kindness. To lead – and love – your team, you must first understand your own worth, respect yourself, and demonstrate compassion for yourself. Accepting who you are and not being scared to fail or take risks are all signs of self-love; you're open to growth and self-development.

So, why should you be concerned about office romance? According to research conducted by Dr Fiona Beddoes-Jones, founder and CEO of Cognitive Fitness Consultancy, 65 per cent of participants believe that love is lacking in their workplace. It's also worth mentioning that a whopping 95% stated they'd work harder for a company that truly cared. Eighty-three per cent of respondents believed that managers should be taught how to love their employees.

Love, according to Beddoes-Jones, consists of compassion, care, and kindness. Isn't it likely that your teammates deserve that from you? After all, we all require love in some form or another.

2. Leaders that are passionate about what they do build winning teams and make a difference in people's lives.

Loving leaders come in all forms and sizes: from well-known and unknown businesses; small, medium, and huge organizations; some may be facing financial difficulties, depleting resources, and skill shortages – while others are not. They're everywhere, that's for sure.

They exhibit philautia, or self-love, which enables them to accept themselves as they are and to take risks in their personal and professional relationships. They also show philia, which is defined as a friendship between equals in which each partner grows through mutual respect, admiration, and trust. They create compassionate and caring settings because they are compassionate and caring for themselves. Their love originates from the depths of their souls.

The main message here is that leaders who love their jobs build winning teams and make a difference in people's lives.

Consider the following example of a caring leader: CEO of the grocery company Market Basket, Arthur T. Demoulas.

Demoulas joined Market Basket as a member of the family that created the company. He'd always prioritized keeping employee compensation high while keeping customer prices low. He was more concerned with his employees and customers than with his bottom line. He'd even been able to expand the company and increase annual sales from $3 million to over $4 million. And it was evident that he cared about his people. He knew not only their names but also their birthdays and other significant life events, regardless of their rank. He attended their weddings and funerals as well. He was regarded by many as a father figure.

However, he was sacked as a result of family feuds. Six of his senior managers left as a result, and Market Basket employees staged protests outside stores.

The board retaliated by firing rally organizers who supported Demoulas. This backfired spectacularly: 5,000 people gathered outside a Market Basket in Massachusetts within 24 hours, and protests continued at 71 other locations. Customers boycotted the company after drivers refused to make deliveries. Demoulas issued a public statement demanding that everyone who had been sacked is reinstated.

Demoulas was finally reinstated when governors from two states intervened to negotiate and over 160 mayors promised to boycott Market Basket. And what was the first thing he did? Naturally, he welcomed his coworkers back to work and returned the organization to normalcy.

Demoulas recognizes the good in others, places his trust in them, and relies on them. Those who come into contact with him are supportive and willing to go above and beyond. He's built a loving environment in which individuals are valued, and as a result, he's changed lives.

3. Self-awareness, vulnerability, and kindness are all required for leading with love.

Love has a positive impact on the workplace, according to research. Wharton academics Sigal Barsade and Olivia A. O'Neill, for example, found that employees who recognized the love and caring in their workplaces had higher job satisfaction, took fewer sick days, and collaborated more effectively.

Love strengthens team relationships, according to other studies, and businesses with love have tighter teams, a more forgiving culture, better performance, and more trust. A long-term study even found that people who receive peer support, which is a type of love, live longer.

However, there is no secret component to love: no course, package, or certification that can be checked. It's up to you to approach love with sincerity — from the bottom of your heart.

The main takeaway is that leading with love necessitates self-awareness, vulnerability, and kindness.

There are three principles to focus on in order to create genuine love:

To begin, develop self-awareness in order to uncover who you truly are. This might be a scary process because self-awareness requires you to comprehend your emotions and feelings, which isn't easy for everyone. The finest leaders, on the other hand, remain open to learning more about themselves because they recognize the potential rewards. You can see how your emotions affect your performance when you acknowledge how you feel after receiving feedback, for example. This allows you to be more receptive to new information.

Second, teams need connection, engagement, and relatability - but these qualities aren't possible without one more characteristic: vulnerability. That's not something we normally connect with strong leadership; in fact, it's frequently misinterpreted as a sign of weakness, lowering a leader's status and authority.

Vulnerability, on the other hand, is defined by openness and a willingness to take chances. Leaders who are vulnerable disclose what they don't know and question those who do. Vulnerable leaders are, above all, genuine – not perfect, but genuine. They make blunders and have self-doubts. Rather than acting as if they know everything, they lead with their hearts and love.

Finally, there's the quality of kindness. There has rarely been a need for greater kindness in the world, but it appears to be dwindling these days. People become protective and shut down as a result of harsh acts, making them less creative and less willing to participate.

Smiles, a touch of the hand, genuine listening, eye contact, and nonverbal encouragement are all examples of how leaders foster kindness in the workplace. Kind acts have no boundaries, but their impact on others is tremendous.

But keep in mind that love begins with oneself. It's simpler to love people when your leadership is built on self-love.

4. Laughter fosters a more comfortable, creative, and productive work atmosphere.

Laughter has numerous advantages. To begin with, it might be a workout! According to Vanderbilt University research, ten to fifteen minutes of laughter can burn up to 50 calories - almost the same as a piece of chocolate.

It also helps you from becoming sick: psychoneuroimmunologists have discovered that laughter enhances immunological function, vascular health, pain relief, and mental health.

When a company is devoid of laughing, it is devoid of employee engagement, which can lead to a poisonous environment. Humour, on the other hand, elicits positive emotions that help individuals feel good about themselves, their work, and their environment.

The main point here is that laughter fosters a more comfortable, creative, and productive work environment.

So, since you've already decided to exhibit more love in your leadership, how about adding laughter to the mix? To begin, keep in mind that, while love is universally regarded as a positive emotion, laughing may be hostile, confrontational, and demeaning. It has the potential to become sour and even offensive. So, in order to use humour in leadership, you must first comprehend it.

A sense of superiority, which is demonstrated when someone purposely puts someone else down to improve their own status or self-esteem, is one reason people chuckle. Snide remarks and cynical barbs are exchanged, followed by humiliating chortles. This is really a show of power, and it's an excellent illustration of how not to utilize humour.

Another type of laughter that you're undoubtedly familiar with is: Consider for a moment that you've just met a critical deadline. Your supervisor calls a few minutes later to explain that the buyer has changed his mind about what he wants. Then she says, "Just joking!" just as your blood pressure is rising, and you can't help but laugh. Why? Not because what she said was amusing, but because she was relieved. Your restrained energy might be released through laughter.

Finally, there's the issue of inconsistency. When a comedian tells a joke and the punchline comes out unexpectedly, your brain tries to make sense of the discrepancy between what you expected and what actually happened. Ladies and gentlemen, there's a joke for you!

Laughter, for whatever reason, strengthens social bonds. Laughter can be found in every civilization and culture, as well as among different species. So why not in positions of leadership as well?

5. In the workplace, there are several opportunities to deploy sincere humour throughout the day.

It's March 2020, and staff from the nonprofit People For the American Way are slowly checking in and turning on their videos for the weekly Zoom call. Following that, Political Director Lizet Ocampo joins the team. Everyone bursts out laughing as the call participants witness Ocampo's face transformed into a potato with her eyes and lips. She attempts unsuccessfully to remove the filter, and all anyone can see are her potato eyes darting from side to side as she tries to solve the problem. She eventually gives up and suffers the giggles, remaining a potato throughout the conference.

The main point here is that there are several opportunities to employ heartfelt comedy in the workplace throughout the day.

A member of Ocampo's staff tweeted a photo from the People for the American Way conference the next day. The tweet received more than 45 million likes. And Ocampo was perfectly content with it. The team saw her in a new light as a result of the occurrence, and in the end, the incident brought out the best in them.

Ocampo's team has seen her since that day as someone who pushes them to a high level while still being the fun, authentic and encouraging joy in the workplace. And her narrative can teach you a thing or two. Ocampo is well-liked and capable in his field. People who have worked for her describe her as both lighthearted and serious, someone who values and develops her employees while maintaining high standards. She can tell when one of her employees needs a coach, an educator, or a guide.

Ocampo doesn't cite books or leadership programs; instead, she believes in the individuals she manages. Despite the fact that she has to make judgments, she doesn't take herself too seriously, even when the situation is serious, and she uses humour wherever she can. She creates an environment in which she and her staff can laugh and enjoy themselves. And Ocampo's humour, which isn't written but comes from her heart and soul, is based on her own nature.

Remember that comedy is situational, and it can appear at any time during the day, whether in a Zoom meeting, a presentation, an end-of-year budget analysis, or a strategic planning session. You can always find methods to inject a little levity into your routine.

6. Appropriate workplace humour has numerous advantages.

Laughter can assist your company in a variety of ways. Workplace humour improved performance and satisfaction, increased workgroup cohesion, improved health, and reduced burnout and stress, according to a 2012 study published in the Journal of Managerial Psychology. The authors of a 2017 research in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology suggested that effective use of suitable humour in work signals both confidence and competence. As a result, the joke-teller is thought to have a greater organizational rank.

If you're still not sure that a healthy amount of humour in the office is advantageous, consider the following: Researchers from the University of Bristol discovered that viewing a comedy show increased productivity by up to ten per cent.

The main point here is that appropriate comedy in the workplace has numerous advantages.

True humour comes from the heart and from being yourself — it's not something you can learn. However, there are a few things to keep in mind.

To begin, push yourself to step beyond of your comfort zone and let go. Have the confidence to think for yourself, speak openly, and be aware of your feelings. And the bravery to take a break from your work and not take yourself too seriously; to laugh, have fun, and be creative!

Humility is also important. Humble leaders are frequently viewed as weak, low in self-esteem, and lacking in confidence. This is a far cry from the truth. According to a study published in the Journal of Management, humility in leadership is linked to better performance, teamwork, innovation, and decision-making. Humble leaders are self-assured but not arrogant, truthful, humble, and able to openly laugh at themselves.

Finally, you'll need a healthy dose of empathy, which is the ability to connect with others, understand their feelings and emotions, be polite, and recognize when it's appropriate to laugh at something or share a hilarious moment.

Are you ready to try your hand at humour? Keep your wits about you. Humour can also go horribly wrong. Andrew Tarvin talks in his book Humor That Works on how humour can be a nightmare if it's used disparagingly, or if it divides or distracts people. Off-colour jokes are prohibited, as is the use of the phrase "just kidding" in response to offensive remarks. And don't even consider doing something crazy like showing up to work dressed as a clown. If you try these, your professional reputation will be tarnished.

So utilize humour with caution and responsibility in the job, but try it anyhow. It's possible that your laughing will make the world a better place.

The fundamental message in this summary is that leadership is often devoid of love and joy. Indeed, love and leadership are two words that are rarely associated with one another, but they should be. Love and laughter have numerous workplace benefits, including improved team cohesion, communication, and performance, lower attrition rates, and improved health. Showing your team affection and taking advantage of opportunities to incorporate some appropriate humour into your workday will help you become a better leader.

Here's some additional advice that you can put into practice:

Have a good time at work.

Consider the last time you said or did anything amusing at work. Were you speaking in front of a group or just a few people in your office? When was the last time you laughed at work? There will be more creativity and productivity in your workplace if humour and laughter are present, as well as less sick leave, burnout, and worker turnover. It isn't always easy to let go and laugh, but it is possible!